Give yourself the gift of boundaries this holiday season
Look out for yourself this holiday season.
Set up boundaries with all the family stuff this holiday season. Please don’t say Yes to everything. Saying Yes to everything this holiday season is doing yourself a severe disservice. Instead, take time out for you.
Try not to loosen your schedule just because it is December and you’ve got relatives in town. You still have important things you have to do. You still have goals you want to achieve. You still have continuing education stuff you want to accomplish in your downtime (or your uptime). You still have plans you want to make for 2019. You still want to get after it this holiday season. That should never stop. I don’t care then time of year.
Learn to say no this holiday season. Say No to the parties that you don’t want to go to. Free up that time for yourself. Say no to the sweets that are in your face for the next six weeks. Be sure to stick to the positive disciplines you’ve developed this year: food; movement; working-out; water; recovery. Build a new habit of no — for you.
Do something for yourself and your career this holiday season. Complete that project. Start a new, positive habit. Take some time out for you. It doesn’t have to be 100% about others 100% of the time just because of the season. No. You are not bound to the in-laws. You are not bound to the out-of-towners now in town. You are not bound to someone else’s schedule. And if you’re the out-of-towner, do not expect this from your hosts. They have lives, dreams and goals, too.
Be bound to your schedule. Life doesn’t come to a halt for you just because some relatives are in town. They’re fine. They are adults. They can fend for themselves. They don’t need to be around you all the time. They’ve done it before. They can do it again. In fact, they’re doing it right now. They’ve got this. They’ve got breakfast. They can even do lunch without you. Let them be. Let them be while you get after it. Let them be while you pursue what you pursue. Set a specific time period to spend with them, know your priorities for your day, and then get after it. They do not need 16 hours of your day today. Push back. Set boundaries.
Note that this is not disrespectful. This is not just about them. This is also about you and your time, which should be your most valuable asset. You need away time, too. If they think you need to be around them the entire time just because they’re in town, it is time to re-set that unreasonable expectation. Why make yourself miserable each December? Why take on the added stress? Why start the New Year deflated from all the holiday cheer? Enact new boundaries.
